Welcome to the Crawl

Before you start, make sure someone gives The Schpeel to your group. 

Also, remember these conversation tips: 1) Be polite, and don’t take offense, 2) Say something if you don’t understand, 3) Ask “why” and speak up if you disagree (It’s not rude, its just a good conversation). Now, order a drink and start unpacking the deep mysteries of the universe!

The Big Question: Is there a “Christian” way to Have Sex?

The Main Questions

  • What does it mean to “have sex”, and what is the purpose of doing so?
  • What is sexual desire? What is its role in having sex? Under what circumstances can it be problematic for sex?
  • What is pleasure? What is its role in sex? Under what circumstances can it be problematic for sex?
  • How is justness reflected in the sexual act? Is it?
  • Look at the “Important Scripture” section below.
    • How do these verses speak about the relational (human and divine) dimension of sex?
    • What are some of the values that these Scriptures suggest as guides to a sexual life?
    • How might the category of “sin” relate to sexual activity?
  • How do you perceive the approach to sex by the following communities? Do you think this approach is healthy/unhealthy? Explain.
    • Evangelical Christianity
    • Roman Catholic Christianity
    • Popular Culture and Mass Media
  • What, if any, role do communities play in establishing and guiding sexual ethics?
    • Under what circumstances is sexual ethics no longer a matter between two consenting individuals? (e.g. marriage, age-of consent laws, polygamy)
    • Are corporate social institutions important for healthy sexuality? Why/why not?
  • Can specific sexual acts be immoral if the participants (or individuals) are both willingly consenting and desirous of participating in the sexual act? Why/why not?
  • Should the way Christian’s participate in sexual activity differently from the way that is commonly taken today? What would be different?

Important Scripture

  • That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. // Genesis 2:24
  • Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers. May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer— may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love. // Proverbs 5:15-19
  • How beautiful you are and how pleasing, my love, with your delights! Your stature is like that of the palm, and your breasts like clusters of fruit. I said, “I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit.” May your breasts be like clusters of grapes on the vine, the fragrance of your breath like apples, and your mouth like the best wine. May the wine go straight to my beloved, flowing gently over lips and teeth.  I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me. // Song of Songs 7:6-10
  • But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. // Matthew 5:28
  • Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. // Hebrews 13:4
  • It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God. // 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5
  • Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit. Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.  Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;  you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies. // 1 Corinthians 6:16-20

Thoughts from Others

  • Any relgiion that doesn’t tell you what to do with your pots, pans and private parts isn’t worth believing in. // C.E.W. Green
  • Sex makes monkeys out of all of us. If you don’t give in to it, you wind up a cold, unfeeling bastard. If you do, you spend the rest of your life picking up the pieces. // Rita Mae Brown
  • We may indeed be sure that perfect chastity—like perfect charity—will not be attained by any merely human efforts. We must ask for God’s help. Even when you have done so, it may seem to you for a long time that no help, or less help than you need, is being given. Never mind. After each failure, ask forgiveness, pick yourself up, and try again. // C.S. Lewis
  • I’ve always understood the two to be intertwined: sexuality and spirituality. That never changed. // (The Artist Formerly and Currently Known As) Prince
  • You haven’t got to be in love every time you go to bed. // James Baldwin

  • Nothing one does in bed is immoral if it helps to perpetuate love. // Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  • Chastity does not mean abstention from sexual wrong; it means something flaming, like Joan of Arc. // G.K. Chesterson
  • The failure to understand the infinite depth of the human soul is often why people who are married have affairs. They stop exploring the person they married. They find somebody who appears more interesting. // Rob Bell



This summer, REUNION Somerville’s generosity team has teamed up with the Northern Crawl to turn our conversations into action. Each week, after the discussion, participants will vote on an organization to support financially.

Below are the organizations that will be voted on this week:

  • RAINN – RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) is the nation’s largest anti-sexual violence organization. RAINN created and operates the National Sexual Assault Hotline in partnership with more than 1,000 local sexual assault service providers across the country and operates the DoD Safe Helpline for the Department of Defense. RAINN also carries out programs to prevent sexual violence, help survivors, and ensure that perpetrators are brought to justice.
  • Advocates for Youth – Advocates for Youth envisions a society in which all young people are valued, respected, and treated with dignity; sexuality is accepted as a healthy part of being human; and youth sexual development is recognized as normal. Advocates for Youth champions efforts that help young people make informed and responsible decisions about their reproductive and sexual health.
  • Amirah – Together we are giving hope to survivors of domestic sex trafficking by helping them restore their lives. The name Amirah comes from the Arabic and Persian meaning “daughter of the king/princess. “ As our name implies and based on our faith, we believe each human life is sacred, created in God’s image, and therefore, worthy of love, mercy and justice.  It is our goal that each woman served at Amirah will be restored and empowered with a sense of her inherent value and God-given strengths.